Wednesday, June 3, 2009

How to Lose a Guy "Oey" in 10 days.

So here it is. I am a "Paci" free Mommy to one half of my litter. I know you are all beckoning lol. First of all, let me clearify: An "oey" (rhymes with Joey, without the j) is a Pacifier, well at least in our family. Drew has called it that for the last year and a half. We used to call it a Nunny, this was his translation of that.
We have all dreaded for the day we got rid of all oeys. We have talked of doing it for the last year really. However, Drew having some developmental delays, takes to change rather harshly, and we felt it was still a deep comfort object to him. This is the point where you all gasp that we still allowed our 3 year old to posses his Oey at bedtime. Let me explain....
I will start by mentioning I have been a mom from the getgo that is all about the comfort of my child. I tend to "like the idea" of attached parenting, although i find all aspects of it to not be pertentant in the world we live. Breastfeeding the first year if you can-yah! Co sleeping-yah! i have been even been seen "wearing" my boys in a pouch or sling carrier. Yes. i say I am maybe I little crunchy. But not full throttle...get my drift. I am not an advocate of the "crying it out" methods, such as ferber or baby wise. I kinda of Cringe at the thoughts to be honest. I say this b/c i feel these methods don't always work for all children, and sometimes, young babies need cuddles and closness : To build secruity and trust. Dont' get me wrong:These methods have worked for many mom's I know: just not my parenting style. i say to each their own :)
So when I brought my babies home from the hospital,nursing, i welcomed an "oey". I have heard of Nipple confusion and what not, however, my little guys were "suckers" literally from the get go, so, I soothed them by nursing AND pacifing, b/c to be honest, i myself did not want to be a human pacifier.
Drew was a very fussy baby, I nursed him a very short time, he grew attahced to his oey at a very young age. It was my only sanity through his infancy. (gasp).
There i admitted it. It only mountain-hilled as he aged, and got harder to convincemyself, or him of the idea of taking it. However, I felt, if he "needed" it as a comfort object, i would comply at bedtime. The "oey" was limited to sleepytimes around 2 years old.
I started really feeling the crunch a few weeks ago around drews THIRD birthday, noticing him only "needing" it to fall asleep at night, or nap time. What the hey? Why not replace it with another comfort object?
8 days ago, i cut the nipple right off of Oey, and stratigically placed it under drew's pillow where he finds it every night. On this night however, drew gasped and said uh-oh?
in his own words....
"uh-oh ummy, ut append?" (uh oh mommy what happend?)
"it boken." (it's broken)
I went on to explain that oey is now broken and we don't need it any more. At that point drew picked it up and THREW it against the wall.
I cringed at the thought of the on coming tantrum.
However, his lip just quivered, he got really sad, and hunkered down in my arms. It took awhile for him to fall asleep that night. But we haven't looked back. He has done amazing. And really, some big part of me is just so proud of him. It was a hard thing for him, b/c I know he was so attached. It was an even HARDER for thing for mummy and daddy, because we didn't not know what to even expect.
so there, that is how you lose an oey in 10, well really, 8 days. I bet you are so glad you read this post. Now you know what an oey is :)


1 comment:

The Writer Chic said...

Congrats, Amy! That is a huge accomplishment. Seth has never used a pacifier, but I know from a few girlfriends that it can be really, really tough to do. Sounds like you've got a big boy champ on your hands. =)